"We Put Up $20,000 Each, You’d Think That I’d Care, Right?”

The PokerGO on-demand library is full of hundreds of hours of content and tons of viewing options but, if you were on your last breath and wanted to spend your last few minutes on Earth watching PokerGO, I’d suggest Poker After Dark, Season 1: Episode 25. Named Phil Phil, featuring two of the most excitable players in the world, Phil Hellmuth and Phil Laak.

Because DVD commentary is awesome, here is another Poker After Dark Commentary Session.

“What was your appearance fee today Phil?” – Antonio Esfandiari
“You know I charge $50,000 a day. Plus, first class airfare and hotel.” – Phil Hellmuth

After the first commercial break of the episode, Hellmuth thinks aloud about his new trappy strategy that he predicts is going to clip Esfandiari in a big pot. While Esfandiari doesn’t seem too concerned with the Poker Brat’s empty threats, he does seem interested in his day rate, which is more than double game’s $20,000 buy-in. Not included in this episode of Poker After Dark, Esfandiari calling his agent to renegotiate his own day rate.

“No private jet?” – Jennifer Harman

Where does Hellmuth go next if Jennifer Harman doesn’t casually drop her “private jet” comment? What Las Vegas nightclub does he shout out? Which steakhouse gets a five-star review? Which NBA player does he name drop? The possibilities are literally endless but the only thing better than humble bragging Phil Hellmuth is utterly speechless Phil Hellmuth. Also, Jennifer Harman is the real MVP of every Poker After Dark episode.

“I’m going to play my A-game.” – Phil Laak

While Hellmuth quietly recovers from the nuclear bomb that was Harmon’s “No private jet?” question, Phil Laak elects to fill the void with an important announcement to the table. The Unabomber announces that he is ready to play his A-game. On another day, this comment could cause some concern for the rest of the table but today, Laak orders a screwdriver. A-game indeed.

“I think I’m on some kind of massive tilt, I have like absolutely zero patience. I told myself, ‘Phil, be patient today.’ We put up $20,000 each, you’d think that I’d care, right?” – Phil Hellmuth

Hellmuth has recovered, thank god, and since he missed out on a humble brag opportunity earlier, he is making up for lost time. Hellmuth, while holding queen-high against a flop bet from Doyle Brunson, tries to explain how the $20,000 buy-in should make him care about the game. Personally, this entire speech falls on deaf ears, you know, since Hellmuth already told us about his $50,000 appearance fee.

“You like those cards American public?” – Phil Hellmuth

Phil, the American public can already see your cards courtesy of the Poker After Dark graphics on the left-hand side of the screen.

“Have you ever smoked pot?” – Antonio Esfandiari
“He might run for president someday, so he can’t talk about those things.” – Erik Seidel

The randomness of Antonio Esfandiari continues. Phil Hellmuth is still his under the bright lights of the Magician’s interrogation but this time, Esfandiari is not talking about day rates. Instead, he’s talking about marijuana and while Hellmuth answers in the negative, he only drinks alcohol, Erik Seidel sends a chill down my spine with the idea of Phil Hellmuth running for President of the United States in 2020…

To watch Poker After Dark and other original programming and live events, visit PokerGO.com and be on the look out for more Poker After Dark Commentary Sessions before the series reboots on August 14.