#RIPvine, Well Sorta

Do not believe everything you read on the internet. If 2016 taught us anything it is that fake news lurks around every corner. Check and double check sources, understand the sometimes blurry line between opinion and fact and do your due diligence before jumping to conclusions. I’m usually pretty good at separating fact from fiction, overreaction from composure but this morning, my judgment lapsed.

Doing my usual ‘Wake Up, Check Twitter’ routine, I scrolled across a handful of tweets involving the hashtag #RIPvine. It usually takes a while to drag myself up and out of bed but #RIPvine had traumatically jump started my day. It was like social media, as I knew it, was flashing before my eyes.

My first thought, “Do I actually have to watch basketball games now?”

Watching non-playoff basketball is my actual nightmare but since the NBA was made for Vine, or maybe it’s the other way around, I thankfully don’t need to! I might not have time to watch 48 minutes of January NBA action but I do have time for six-seconds of Russell Westbrook being really fast, strong, explosive and angry at a basketball hoop, six-seconds of Kobe Bryant cursing up a storm about practice, six-seconds of Stan Van Gundy screaming about forming a wall and six-seconds of Steph Curry turning Chris Paul’s ankles to complete and utter dust. I could also make time to watch Los Angeles Clippers owner Steve Ballmer doing this for the rest of my life.

Coupled with my fear of losing my daily recap of six-second NBA highlights, how would I watch a dog play the cowbell, Ted Cruz elbowing his wife in the face, people flipping water bottles, people flipping chairs, people crossing up babies and anything else amazing that the wild world of the internet would spit out on a day-to-day basis. I need this stuff. We need this stuff. The world needs this stuff.

After my initial panic attack, I composed myself and started mindlessly scrolling through everything that the #RIPvine hashtag had to offer. Then, as my brain was melting and my world was crumbling into itself, I found it.

Vine actually wasn’t dead; it was just going through some cosmetic procedures. Vine, as we know it, won’t exist but Vine Camera, a new app that will still let users create six-second looping, shareable videos, will. How Vine Camera will actually work remains to be seen but for now, my morning crisis was averted and I’m as happy as Steve Ballmer.